These signs were really posted at different businesses or other locations.
At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet? Miss a car payment.
At A Laundry Shop: How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory?
At a pizza shop: 7 days without pizza makes one weak.
At an optometrist's office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
At the electric company: We would be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be.
Billboard on the side of the road: Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs.
In a farmer’s field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but be aware that the bull charges.
In a health food shop window: Closed due to illness.
In a Maine restaurant: Open seven days a week and weekends.
In a New York restaurant: Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager.
In a non-smoking area: If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.
In a Pennsylvania cemetery: Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves.
In the front yard of a funeral home: Drive carefully. We’ll wait.
Maternity Clothes Shop: We are open on Labor Day.
On a desk in a reception room: We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left.
On a fence: Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive.
On a maternity room door: Push. Push. Push.
On a plumber's truck: We repair what your husband fixed.
On a repair shop door: We can repair anything. (Please knock hard — bell out of order.)
On a restaurant: Try our fish just for the halibut.
No comments:
Post a Comment