Daffy Definitions

I came across some very interesting definitions to everyday words and phrases. I hope you enjoy this daffy compilation.

Abundance - A baker's exercise (A-bun-dance)

Arbitrator - A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's.

Avoidable - What a bullfighter tries to do.

Baloney - Where some hemlines fall.

Band-Aid - A fund to help a band.

Burglarize - What a crook sees with.

Cadillac - Lack of cattle.

Cookout - The cook's day off.

Counterfeiters - Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.

Cowhide - Game of Hide and Seek played by cows.

Dieting - The penalty for exceeding the feed limit.

Eclipse - What a Cockney barber does for a living.

Feather Brained - Fuzzy headed.

Flying Saucers - The wife is on a rampage.

Good-bye - A bargain.

Gossip - 24-hour teller.

Hatchet - What a hen does to an egg.

Headlight - A dizzy spell.

Heavy Duty - Loading an elephant.

Hence - An enclosure around a hen yard.

Heroes - What a guy in a boat does.

Ideal Person - A card player that wants to deal everytime.

Illegal - A sick bird.

Installment - Putting a horse in a stall.

Laughing Stock - Cattle, horses, sheep and hogs responding to a good joke.

Left Bank - What the robber did when his bag was full of loot.

Life Jacket - A special coat that lasts a lifetime.

Lip Service - Applying lipstick.

Little Dipper - A small boy diving.

Long Jump - When the cow jumped over the moon.

Matchbook - A book about matches.

Megaphone - A very large telephone.

Mohair - What bald headed men need.

Moth Ball - A special social event for moths.

Network - The process of making nets.

Over Leap - When the cow jumped over the moon.

Overloaded - An elephant riding a bicycle.

Oyster Bed - A place for an oyster to sleep.

Paradox - Two physicians.

Period - A comma that curled up and went to sleep.

Pharmacist - A helper on the farm.

Piggyback - A lost pig is back home.

Pigment - A mint plant grown to feed hogs.

Pineapple - An apple that grew on a pine tree.

Polarize - What penguins see with.

Polite - A light on a pole.

Polygon - A parrot that got away.

Primate - Removing your spouse from in front of the TV.

Quarterback - Change when you pay for a 75¢ item with a dollar bill.

Refuse - Replacing a burned out fuse.

Relief - What trees do in the spring.

Remind - A brain transplant.

Retire - Replacement of tires.

Rock Music - A lullaby sung in a rocking chair.

Roman - A person that never settles very long in one place.

Scorekeeper - Someone that knows the score but keeps it to himself.

Showoff - The show has been cancelled.

Selfish - What the owner of a seafood store does.

Subdued - Like, a guy who, like, works on one of those, like, submarines, man.

Sudafed - Brought litigation against a government official.

Sunny - A bright boy.

Sunburn - What you basked for.

Sweater - A person that freely perspires.

Time Keeper - A guy that didn't return your watch.

Tireless - Have a car but have no tires.

Tooth Picks - The choices many dentists give patients to select their artificial teeth.

Touch-Me-Not - A person with a severe sunburn.

Travelers Aid - A soft drink for tourists.

Vegetarian - An old indian word meaning "bad hunter."

Vitamin - What you do when someone comes to the house.

Well Done - A water, gas or oil well is completed.

Weekend - A book with a blah ending.

Whether - Unpredictable weather.

Wildlife - Living it up!

Woodchuck - Throwing a heavy pole, post or other item made of wood.

Workout - An outside job.

Writer - One who corrects a wrong.

Year Book - A book that takes a year to read.

Zero Hour - Time kept by a "cuckoo" clock.