Thursday, May 10, 2007

Crazy State Laws

• An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
• Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault", while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault".
• Communism has been against the law in Haines City, La., since 1950.
• If you've ever been to Mardi Gras in New Orleans, you'll see the kings and queens on the various floats throwing plastic money, medallions and jewels to the crowd, but not food. It's against the law to throw food from a float in the Mardi Gras festivities.
• It is against state law to steal even a single crawfish.
• It is illegal to gargle in public places.
• It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
• It illegal for a woman to drive a car unless her husband is waving a flag in front of it.
• It is illegal in Lafayette, Louisiana to play a musical instrument for the purpose of attracting attention, without a license.
• It's legal to walk down the street with a drink in New Orleans, even to drive with a drink. But if you fall over and block the sidewalk, you've just broken the law.
• Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
• New Orleans: You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.
• Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.

• After January 14th you will be charged a fine for having your Christmas decorations still up.
• In Augusta to stroll down the street playing a violin is against the law.
• It's illegal to clean salmon along Maine's upper Kennebec River. Enforcement of this law has been made easier for many years by the fact that, because of a dam, there are no salmon on the upper Kennebec River.
• In Maine, it is illegal to sell a car on Sunday unless it comes equipped with plumbing.
• In Maine it's illegal to catch lobsters with your bare hands.
• In Portland shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
• In Waterville, Maine, it is illegal to blow one's nose in public.
• It's unlawful to tickle a woman's chin with a feather duster in Portland.
• You may not step out of a plane in flight.

• Baltimore City: Though you may spit on a city roadway, spitting on city sidewalks is prohibited. You may not curse inside the city limits.
• Baltimore: It's illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits. It's illegal to take a lion to the movies. It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless. (1898) -Park Rule 6 It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday.
• Baltimore has regulations governing the disposal of hog's heads, pet droppings and oyster shells.
• Columbia: You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish. Though clotheslines are banned, clothes may be draped over a fence.
• Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
• Gypsies should steer clear of Caroline County, Md., where it's a $100 fine or six months in the can for "forecasting or pretending to foretell the future."
• In Baltimore it's illegal to block the sidewalk with a box. But the offense only carries a $1 fine. Another law makes it illegal to throw bale of hay (or of anything else) out a second-story window. That gets you a $20 fine.
In Baltimore it's illegal to play professional croquet before 2 p.m. Sunday. The law also applies to professional quoits.
• In Baltimore it is illegal to mistreat oysters.
• In Baltimore, it is illegal to wash or scrub sinks no matter how dirty they get.
• In Baltimore, Maryland, it is not legal to take a lion to the movies.
• In Halethrope, Maryland kisses longer than one second are illegal.
• In Maryland, a woman may not go through her husband's pockets while he is sleeping.
• In Maryland, men may not buy drinks for female bartenders.
• In Maryland, the legislature once proposed a board of parachute examiners to be made up of five licensed parachute instructors who would test and license all other parachute instructors. The plan had been abandoned when it was learned there were only three licensed parachute instructors in the state.
• Maryland now requires that alcohol beverage writers be certified as experts by an agency of the state before they can receive product samples, which it limits to three bottles per brand.
• Thistles may not grow in one's yard.
• You cannot swear while inside the city limits of Baltimore.
• You cannot throw a bail of hay out of a second story window in Annapolis.
• You may not curse inside the city limits.

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