Crazy State Laws

Massachusetts
• A Boston mayor who disliked dancing and liked to retire early once banned midnight dancing in the Hub City.
• Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
• An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
• At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
• Boston: It is illegal to play the fiddle. Two people may not kiss in front of a church. No more than two baths may be taken within the confines of the city. No one may cross the Boston Common without carrying a shotgun in case of bears. Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except o Sundays. It is illegal to eat peanuts in church. An old law prohibits the taking of baths on Sunday. Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the Governor is present. Women may not wear heels over 3 inches in length while on the common. No one may take a bath without a prescription. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs.
• Both Massachusetts and New Hampshire had old laws that penalized gamblers who lost money. You'd get fined in Massachusetts if you had any money left.
• Bullets may not be used as currency.
• Burlington: You may not walk around with a "drink".
• Cambridge: It is illegal to shake carpets in the street, or to throw orange peels on the sidewalk. It costs $50 extra for a permit for hurling, soccer or Gaelic football games in a public park on a Sunday.
• Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
• Defacing a milk carton is punishable by a $10 fine.
• Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
• Hingham: You may not have colored lights on your house if it can be seen from Main Street. Only white lights may be visible. If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.
• Hopkinton: Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.
• Hunting on Sundays is prohibited.
• Holyoke, Massachusetts, makes it unlawful to water your lawn when it is raining.
• In a law that predates returnable bottles and cans, it's illegal in Boston to rummage through rubbish containers.
• In 1659 the state of Massachusetts outlawed Christmas.
• In Boston it's illegal to post an advertisement on a public urinal. It's also against the law to hang a vending machine on a utility pole.
• In Boston, it's illegal to cut firewood in the street, or shoot a bow and arrow in the street.
• In Boston, Massachusetts it is illegal to take a bath unless instructed to do so by a physician.
• In Massachusetts, it is unlawful to deliver diapers on Sunday, regardless of emergencies.
• In Provincetown, Mass., it's illegal to sell suntan oil until after noon on Sunday.
• It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
• It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
• It is illegal to put tomatoes in clam chowder.
• It is illegal to take more than 2 baths a month within Boston confines.
• It is unlawful to injure a football goal post, doing so is punishable by a $200 fine
• It's illegal to allow someone to use stilts while working on the construction of a building.
• It's illegal to drive Texan, Mexican, Cherokee, or Indian cattle on a public road.
• It's illegal to keep a mule on the second floor of a building not in a city unless there are 2 exits.
• It's illegal to sell fewer than 24 ducklings at a time before May 1, or to sell rabbits, chicks, or ducklings that have been painted a different color.
• It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.
• Longmeadow: It is illegal for two men to carry a bathtub across the town green.
• Marlboro: It is illegal to buy, sell or possess a squirt gun. Silly string is illegal in the city limits. One may not detonate a nuclear device in the city. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.
• Massachusetts law declares that peanuts may not be eaten in court.
• Massachusetts liquor stores can only open on Sundays if they are in Berkshire, Essex, Franklin, Middlesex or Worcester counties and are within 10 miles of the Vermont or New Hampshire borders.
• Milford: Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
• Newton: All families must be given a hog from the town's mayor.
• No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
• North Andover: An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.
• Public boxing matches are outlawed.
• Quakers and witches are banned.
• Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
• Southbridge, Massachusetts, makes it illegal to read books or newspapers after 8 p.m. in the streets.
• Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.
• Under an old law in Marblehead, Mass., it was illegal to cross the street on Sunday, unless absolutely necessary.
• You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish.
• You may not curse inside the city limits.