1. Weigh yourself fully clothed after dinner and again the next morning without clothes and before breakfast, because it's nice to see how much weight you've lost overnight!
2. Never weigh yourself with wet hair.
3. When weighing, remove everything, including eyeglasses. In this case, blurred vision is an asset. Don't forget to remove jewelry as it could weigh as much as a pound!
4. Buy only cheap scales, never the medical kind. Accuracy is the enemy and high quality scales are very accurate.
5. Always go to the bathroom first.
6. Weigh yourself after a haircut, this is good for up to half a pound of hair (hopefully).
7. Exhale with all your might BEFORE stepping onto the scale. (Air has weight, right?)
8. Start out with just one foot on the scale, then holding onto a towel rod slowly edge your other foot onto the scale while slowly releasing the towel rod. Admittedly, this takes time, but it's worth it. You will weigh at least two pounds less than if you'd stepped onto the scale normally.